“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that frightens us most. We ask ourselves, 'Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, and famous?' Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that people won't feel insecure around you. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in all of us. And when we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”
-Used by Nelson Mandela in his 1994 inaugural speech.
As one grows in life they realize that in order to succeed, in all aspects of life, they must possess certain characteristics in order to do so. One of those characteristics, among many and one that is the most important, is CONFIDENCE! Confidence is the belief in oneself and one's powers or abilities. Everyone wishes to be as confident as the next person and we all strive to better ourselves in order to feel that we are (I HOPE :/).
What must one do to feel confident? This is a question that we have all asked. Really it isn't a question that a confident person would ask, but not everyone is confident. In fact, I'm pretty sure that no one is as confident as they put off to be. Being confident in yourself, your work, your friends or your family all comes with trusting yourself. In order to trust yourself you must believe in yourself.
"I AM BEAUTIFUL." This should come to mind whenever you look at yourself in the mirror. I'm not saying to be narcissistic, but approving of yourself is important. When you tell yourself that you are beautiful don't just look at the outward appearance, look at the inside as well. It is what is inside of you that makes you beautiful and believing that you are a good person along with doing things that are good. If you don't believe that you are beautiful then of course no one else will. If you don't believe that your work is good, or your accomplishments are enough, or that you are successful, then of course no one else will. Confidence (not arrogance, there is a difference) is what makes someone beautiful, it is what makes us desirable. Respecting yourself and your body is what makes you beautiful and people will start to take note of the way you treat yourself and regard yourself, and they will see that you are confident in yourself.
There are so many people in this world that are not traditionally beautiful, but because they believe in themselves and are confident people look at them as if they are. We all must believe in ourselves and be the individuals we are meant to be. We must wear the clothes we desire, style our hair the way we want, say what we feel, and do what it is we please in order to feel the way we want to feel. At the end of the day we have to live with ourselves. At the end of the day we have to look in the mirror and tell ourselves that we are happy with who we are and what we are. Confidence is not just about the way you look, it's about the way you feel about yourself.
Walk into a room and hold your head up high, not in an arrogant way, but a respectful way. Be ready to learn and take in as much knowledge and experience as possible. Be ready to be spontaneous, be ready to different. Be confident and don't let anyone tell you that you aren't! You truly are beautiful, you just have to believe it first!
Love you,
Brandon Michael
Thursday, August 19, 2010
Tuesday, August 10, 2010
Connections and Fears
Everyday we meet new people, experience new situations, feel different emotions, and learn from the way we do things. We all have fears. We all ask the question of what if. But, what if we all faced our fears, and we all stopped asking what if? What if we let our heart decide?
There are 6,697,254,041 people on this planet. There are 307,006,550 people in the United States alone. People are all around us and they are easy to meet. That said, it is rare that one encounters another being that they feel a connection with. We live our whole lives looking for a mate, partner, boyfriend, girlfriend, husband or wife to fill a void that we feel when alone. We look for that spark, or in other words a connection with another. For me a connection with a person is more important than the way a person looks or what their social status is. A connection can sometimes be hard to come across but when one does it feels amazing. That amazing feeling comes from being comfortable around someone, someone making you laugh, the ease of just sitting in the same room together in silence and not worrying about what to say. It comes from the perfect kiss, being the perfect fit while cuddling, and the ease of conversation. The connection is the easy part when two people are presented to each other that connect well. It's like polar attraction, positive with negative, like magnets. The hard part though is dealing with the connection. Sometimes people get scared and start worrying about what may happen in the future instead of focusing on what is happening in the present. At this point the emotions come into play. Emotions start to build and break down, and feelings ultimately develop, get hurt, or grow stronger. If a connection is what people want, then why do they give it up when its put in front of them because they are scared of what may happen?
Being scared and having fears is a part of life. I promised myself a long time ago that I would never let my fears of what may happen hinder the way I live my life. We must face our fears because in order to experience life to its full potential we must take chances. It should be a goal to want to meet as many people as possible and experience the new. I know that when I leave this life I want people to know that I lived my life and that I was happy while living it. NO REGRETS! This may be naieve, but at least I'll never look back and ask myself "What if I would have done this differently?" I'll be able to say the I connected with who I was suppose to connect with. I'll be able to be happy with my decisions and how my life panned out because at one point I was happy with what I decided or who I met.
My biggest fears in life are as follows; 1. The fear of being alone 2. The fear of being a failure 3. The fear of not knowing. 4. Sharks 5. The Ocean 6. Heights 7. Myself. I am working to defeat them as I type this post. I'm not going to let myself be alone, be a failure, or not know. I'm going to find the love of my life, be successful, and know all that is to know.I'm going to swim with sharks, explore the ocean and go sky diving. Most of all I'm gonna face myself for the person I am. I'm going to forget the past, live in the present, and look to the future. Not once will I ever again look back and tell myself I should have said something differently, or that I should have done something a different way. I'm living for me and without trust in myself and the person I am I'll never grow as an individual. I'm going to let my heart decide, and my heart is big and full of love, so hopefully it will guide me in the right path.
If you can live another day in fear, live in regret, and live not knowing, then you aren't living at all. Face your fears. Grab life by its balls and let it know who is boss. Live for you, not for what may happen. Find your connections. Find yourself. Love the person you are and the people that make you happy.
Thanks,
Brandon
There are 6,697,254,041 people on this planet. There are 307,006,550 people in the United States alone. People are all around us and they are easy to meet. That said, it is rare that one encounters another being that they feel a connection with. We live our whole lives looking for a mate, partner, boyfriend, girlfriend, husband or wife to fill a void that we feel when alone. We look for that spark, or in other words a connection with another. For me a connection with a person is more important than the way a person looks or what their social status is. A connection can sometimes be hard to come across but when one does it feels amazing. That amazing feeling comes from being comfortable around someone, someone making you laugh, the ease of just sitting in the same room together in silence and not worrying about what to say. It comes from the perfect kiss, being the perfect fit while cuddling, and the ease of conversation. The connection is the easy part when two people are presented to each other that connect well. It's like polar attraction, positive with negative, like magnets. The hard part though is dealing with the connection. Sometimes people get scared and start worrying about what may happen in the future instead of focusing on what is happening in the present. At this point the emotions come into play. Emotions start to build and break down, and feelings ultimately develop, get hurt, or grow stronger. If a connection is what people want, then why do they give it up when its put in front of them because they are scared of what may happen?
Being scared and having fears is a part of life. I promised myself a long time ago that I would never let my fears of what may happen hinder the way I live my life. We must face our fears because in order to experience life to its full potential we must take chances. It should be a goal to want to meet as many people as possible and experience the new. I know that when I leave this life I want people to know that I lived my life and that I was happy while living it. NO REGRETS! This may be naieve, but at least I'll never look back and ask myself "What if I would have done this differently?" I'll be able to say the I connected with who I was suppose to connect with. I'll be able to be happy with my decisions and how my life panned out because at one point I was happy with what I decided or who I met.
My biggest fears in life are as follows; 1. The fear of being alone 2. The fear of being a failure 3. The fear of not knowing. 4. Sharks 5. The Ocean 6. Heights 7. Myself. I am working to defeat them as I type this post. I'm not going to let myself be alone, be a failure, or not know. I'm going to find the love of my life, be successful, and know all that is to know.I'm going to swim with sharks, explore the ocean and go sky diving. Most of all I'm gonna face myself for the person I am. I'm going to forget the past, live in the present, and look to the future. Not once will I ever again look back and tell myself I should have said something differently, or that I should have done something a different way. I'm living for me and without trust in myself and the person I am I'll never grow as an individual. I'm going to let my heart decide, and my heart is big and full of love, so hopefully it will guide me in the right path.
If you can live another day in fear, live in regret, and live not knowing, then you aren't living at all. Face your fears. Grab life by its balls and let it know who is boss. Live for you, not for what may happen. Find your connections. Find yourself. Love the person you are and the people that make you happy.
Thanks,
Brandon
Wednesday, August 4, 2010
Wicked!
I finally saw a Broadway musical and I was very impressed. WICKED was well, WICKED good. I didn't realize before but I knew a lot of the songs and was even able to sing along to a few. I may be turning into a theatre gay. Lol yeah right, but it was a great experience and I can't wait to see another. While watching Wicked it brought up some old feelings and new realizations.
While watching Wicked last night, it brought back memories from high school and how cruel people can be. As a closet case, that clearly shouldn't have been hiding, I was tormented by fellow students for who I was and what I couldn't change. I mean I had tons of friends, which were mostly girls, and a few guy friends too. But, just like Alphaba I felt outcasted by a select few for something I couldn't change. Once people actually got to know me they realized that all I wanted was the same thing they did. I wanted to fit in, I wanted a friend, and continue to want those things today of course. I remember trying to dress more like a "man" but of course my gay senses took over and I always ended up looking way better than any of the guys in school. I talked deeper, walked broader, worked out more, and joined some sports teams to show off my "testosterone". I even pretended to have a girl friend (whom was actually a boyfriend) and his code name was Kayla. I walked around pretending to be someone I wasn't because of the fear of rejection that overwhelmed me whenever I tried to speak with someone about the way I am.
Rejection is an inevitable process that all of us encounter through out life. We cope with the cards we are dealt in life and play the best hand we can. We reinvent ourselves, resculpt ourselves, and cover up what isn't acceptable to the real world. Why do we look for approval of others? Why aren't we able to provide enough approval for ourselves? For me, this is an easy question. I'm a people pleaser, a giver, and sometimes a push over. That said, I like many others, look for approval from people because I want to feel good about myself, I want to fulfill the needs I possess to please others.
Pleasing other's can be hard though. Today's society has put so much pressure on people to be "normal" that we don't even know what normal is anymore. In fact today's society has taken it to an even higher degree by expecting people to be perfect and people fall into this trap. THERE ARE NO NORMS! We are all individuals with differences and imperfections that make us the people we are. Some of us may be a little quirky, brainy, plain looking, adherent, too skinny, too fat or just plain out flawed. These weaknesses, as some would put it, in ourselves make us who we are though.
Some of my weaknesses are clear to people when they meet me. I'm way too kind, gullible, immature, insecure sometimes, and impatient at other times. But, I am who I am. I'm learning and growing everyday to fix the things that I need to. I want to be the best person I can be for myself. I also want to be the best person I can be for the world and want to make a difference while doing so.
So many people have lost hope in the world. They've seen the bad, the ugly, and the evil and they don't even bother anymore to fix it. It almost seems like people have given up on what used to be "normal". They've given up on manners, doing good deeds for others, and trying to make an honest living. This needs to be fixed! PEOPLE GET WITH IT ALREADY! Be a good person and stop judging books by their covers. There are so many good people in this world that are passed by at every second. The next time you are walking on the street and you make eye contact with someone smile at them, say hello! These small things will help the world to be a better place.
By making the world a better place one smile at a time or one hello at a time, everyone will be affected in a positive way. Judgement on people's flaws will be forgotten, good things will start happening and we will all start living the good life! DON'T FORGET who your are! DON'T STOP BELIEVING in yourself! And most of all NEVER STOP DREAMING! Have faith, do good to others, and have a positive outlook on life and you will see what a difference it will make!
We all want the same thing! LOVE, HAPPINESS, FRIENDSHIP, FAMILY and a sense of BELONGING! So make it happen!
Best,
Brandon
While watching Wicked last night, it brought back memories from high school and how cruel people can be. As a closet case, that clearly shouldn't have been hiding, I was tormented by fellow students for who I was and what I couldn't change. I mean I had tons of friends, which were mostly girls, and a few guy friends too. But, just like Alphaba I felt outcasted by a select few for something I couldn't change. Once people actually got to know me they realized that all I wanted was the same thing they did. I wanted to fit in, I wanted a friend, and continue to want those things today of course. I remember trying to dress more like a "man" but of course my gay senses took over and I always ended up looking way better than any of the guys in school. I talked deeper, walked broader, worked out more, and joined some sports teams to show off my "testosterone". I even pretended to have a girl friend (whom was actually a boyfriend) and his code name was Kayla. I walked around pretending to be someone I wasn't because of the fear of rejection that overwhelmed me whenever I tried to speak with someone about the way I am.
Rejection is an inevitable process that all of us encounter through out life. We cope with the cards we are dealt in life and play the best hand we can. We reinvent ourselves, resculpt ourselves, and cover up what isn't acceptable to the real world. Why do we look for approval of others? Why aren't we able to provide enough approval for ourselves? For me, this is an easy question. I'm a people pleaser, a giver, and sometimes a push over. That said, I like many others, look for approval from people because I want to feel good about myself, I want to fulfill the needs I possess to please others.
Pleasing other's can be hard though. Today's society has put so much pressure on people to be "normal" that we don't even know what normal is anymore. In fact today's society has taken it to an even higher degree by expecting people to be perfect and people fall into this trap. THERE ARE NO NORMS! We are all individuals with differences and imperfections that make us the people we are. Some of us may be a little quirky, brainy, plain looking, adherent, too skinny, too fat or just plain out flawed. These weaknesses, as some would put it, in ourselves make us who we are though.
Some of my weaknesses are clear to people when they meet me. I'm way too kind, gullible, immature, insecure sometimes, and impatient at other times. But, I am who I am. I'm learning and growing everyday to fix the things that I need to. I want to be the best person I can be for myself. I also want to be the best person I can be for the world and want to make a difference while doing so.
So many people have lost hope in the world. They've seen the bad, the ugly, and the evil and they don't even bother anymore to fix it. It almost seems like people have given up on what used to be "normal". They've given up on manners, doing good deeds for others, and trying to make an honest living. This needs to be fixed! PEOPLE GET WITH IT ALREADY! Be a good person and stop judging books by their covers. There are so many good people in this world that are passed by at every second. The next time you are walking on the street and you make eye contact with someone smile at them, say hello! These small things will help the world to be a better place.
By making the world a better place one smile at a time or one hello at a time, everyone will be affected in a positive way. Judgement on people's flaws will be forgotten, good things will start happening and we will all start living the good life! DON'T FORGET who your are! DON'T STOP BELIEVING in yourself! And most of all NEVER STOP DREAMING! Have faith, do good to others, and have a positive outlook on life and you will see what a difference it will make!
We all want the same thing! LOVE, HAPPINESS, FRIENDSHIP, FAMILY and a sense of BELONGING! So make it happen!
Best,
Brandon
Monday, August 2, 2010
I am ME!!!!
Alright so I’m officially an over thinker. I over analyze every situation to the smallest and greatest degree. I could turn a simple hello into something way bigger than it is. Why is it that I over think things? Well that is something I don’t know, but what I do know is that all of this over thinking is really getting on my nerves. I never realized it until recently, but I’m a deep thinker. I’ll be at dinner with someone and will literally go off on a thinking tangent about how life works and what I can do to make it work better. So I’ve decided to share my over thought thoughts with the world. Maybe they’ll make sense to someone.
Right now I’m being faced with dilemmas in my life and am having a hard time choosing what to do. I’m at a point where new things are beginning and old things are ending. I’m finally single after two years, but so terrified of getting out there and testing the waters that it is sickening, I ruin chances before they are even presented and fail miserably with ones that are presented. I feel alone but feel so free and good. I guess the word alone is negative, so let’s say I feel INDEPENDENT. It is also my last year of school at Indiana University, where I will also be INDEPENDENT and working my ass of to finish up my degree. I’m dreading going back though for some reason.
Indiana University is amazing; I’m not going to lie. It’s kind of like a little New York to be honest. Indiana University is home to a lot of the east coasters that attend during the school year, foreign students from all over, every ethnic background you can think of, and every kind of person as well. But, being in New York and doing me in the big city is what I want. Little New York is not cutting it anymore. The thing is, I have a full ride at IU and should stay and finish up. In fact, I’m going to finish out my senior year at IU. It’s going to be hard though. I’ll have no one to go back to this year (the past two years I’ve had a bf to come back to). I mean of course I’ll have my friends and my family, but being single is just different. It also feels good though.
I guess you could say I need to embrace that good feeling of being on my own and find myself as an individual. I have a lot of dreams and I want to make everyone of them come true. My 7th grade science teacher once told me, that I would be a shining star some day. Other prominent figures have done the same as well throughout my life. My family and friends have always said that I wasn’t meant for such a small town and that the world needed to hear my voice and opinions. To be honest everyone has always told me this. So I’m doing it, I’m fulfilling my dreams once and for all!
I’ve always been a little different as well. You could describe me as a little quirky, a dreamer, a go getter, and an optimistic person with a positive attitude towards life. I have a bubbly, caring and sometimes out of control personality as well. I like to have fun and do what makes me happy, and I’m not afraid to do it in front of anyone either. I may need a nudge or two to get me going but once you’ve nudge me enough, I take off. I strive for being the best and competition in the right setting is a joke to me. I guess you could say that the old Brandon that held back, even know you wouldn’t think that, is done. The new Brandon is here.
That said, for now on I’m going to be me. I’m going to do what makes me happy and I’m not going to stress over the little petty things and drama that others bring into my life. For now on I’m going to stop over analyzing, stop over thinking, and go with the flow. If things are meant to happen then they are meant to happen. I’m done trying to make situations work, people work, relationships work, friendships work, and most of all I’m done trying to make myself work to please others! For now on it’s about me, and beautifying myself in everyway, from the inside to the outside! I AM ME and I AM IMPROVING ME!!!!
Thanks,
Brandon
Right now I’m being faced with dilemmas in my life and am having a hard time choosing what to do. I’m at a point where new things are beginning and old things are ending. I’m finally single after two years, but so terrified of getting out there and testing the waters that it is sickening, I ruin chances before they are even presented and fail miserably with ones that are presented. I feel alone but feel so free and good. I guess the word alone is negative, so let’s say I feel INDEPENDENT. It is also my last year of school at Indiana University, where I will also be INDEPENDENT and working my ass of to finish up my degree. I’m dreading going back though for some reason.
Indiana University is amazing; I’m not going to lie. It’s kind of like a little New York to be honest. Indiana University is home to a lot of the east coasters that attend during the school year, foreign students from all over, every ethnic background you can think of, and every kind of person as well. But, being in New York and doing me in the big city is what I want. Little New York is not cutting it anymore. The thing is, I have a full ride at IU and should stay and finish up. In fact, I’m going to finish out my senior year at IU. It’s going to be hard though. I’ll have no one to go back to this year (the past two years I’ve had a bf to come back to). I mean of course I’ll have my friends and my family, but being single is just different. It also feels good though.
I guess you could say I need to embrace that good feeling of being on my own and find myself as an individual. I have a lot of dreams and I want to make everyone of them come true. My 7th grade science teacher once told me, that I would be a shining star some day. Other prominent figures have done the same as well throughout my life. My family and friends have always said that I wasn’t meant for such a small town and that the world needed to hear my voice and opinions. To be honest everyone has always told me this. So I’m doing it, I’m fulfilling my dreams once and for all!
I’ve always been a little different as well. You could describe me as a little quirky, a dreamer, a go getter, and an optimistic person with a positive attitude towards life. I have a bubbly, caring and sometimes out of control personality as well. I like to have fun and do what makes me happy, and I’m not afraid to do it in front of anyone either. I may need a nudge or two to get me going but once you’ve nudge me enough, I take off. I strive for being the best and competition in the right setting is a joke to me. I guess you could say that the old Brandon that held back, even know you wouldn’t think that, is done. The new Brandon is here.
That said, for now on I’m going to be me. I’m going to do what makes me happy and I’m not going to stress over the little petty things and drama that others bring into my life. For now on I’m going to stop over analyzing, stop over thinking, and go with the flow. If things are meant to happen then they are meant to happen. I’m done trying to make situations work, people work, relationships work, friendships work, and most of all I’m done trying to make myself work to please others! For now on it’s about me, and beautifying myself in everyway, from the inside to the outside! I AM ME and I AM IMPROVING ME!!!!
Thanks,
Brandon
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